Not really but I wish it was. I'm struggling to keep my munchy tendancies in check but it's really hard to do. Fortunately, the hubster and I are doing this together. It makes it a lot easier to do. It keeps me motivated. Even though our goals are so very different, it's nice to have someone to push me when I need pushed (which is more often than it ought to be).
I am just so tired of feeling fat. I don't want to be a size 2. I don't even want to be a size 4 or 6. Even an 8 is pushing it for me - these hips have helped carry two children, I don't expect them to shrink over much and I've grown quite fond of this particular bra size and I'd really like to keep that (though a little added perkiness would be awesome). I figure, when I hit my goal, I'll be a nice curvy 10. I can SO live with that. Hell, I'd be happy at a size 16 if I didn't have this awful belly. When I really sit down to analyze what I see in the mirror - I've got two spots that need work - the belly and the thighs. Everything else - I'm good with. And when I think about it in those terms, it makes my goals seem more than reachable.
Finding the motivation is rough. Especially when it comes to not eating. I need to work on that. I love food - much more than I should. I always have. It's gotten worse since I learned to cook. I'm a pretty good cook - and unfortunately, it shows a bit too well. In time it will happen. I have to believe that or I'm finished before I start.
I have to add something to my list of equipment now - we have a bench. Not a machine, just a regular, plain bench. I won't be using it much until we reach toning phase. For the next few months, we're just in LOSE phase. But - it's nearing my excersize time and I need to get some things ready beforehand. Things to keep Mr. 3 out from under my feet. He thinks it's great fun when I'm doing the yoga stretches to get right under me and mimic me. It's cute but it makes accomplishing anything really difficult.
I have been horribly remiss about blogging lately - on all fronts. It's been quite the year - full of not so nice things. I am right now, the unhealthiest I have ever been. And the heaviest too (discounting pregnancy weight). These last few months, I haven't wanted to do anything more than be a veggie. That can't continue. The Hubster is feeling it too. So - we're embarking on a new plan. The farm is a LONG way away. The organic stuff, we do when we can, as we can.
I'm setting reasonable goals with a reasonable timeline. Even though I'd love to be skinny again by Christmas, that's just unlikely. I know me. It's going to take time and dedication but I'm really hoping that by June 1st of 2010, I can put on my bathing suit and not cringe. Even better - I'd like to wear my pretty bikini again. It's been many years since I could.
Technically this started last week but it's easier to measure from the first of the month. And I didn't want to start posting about this until I had a routine I was pretty sure I could stick to.
Every day I wake up feeling like I really want to skip my excersize that day. And every day, I do it anyway. I'm doing a combination of things - the floor excersizes I remember from my long ago dance classes, light weight training, and using the wii fit for my cardio - the boxing is awesome and never fails to make me sweat.
I plan to do biweekly weigh ins. I'm setting short goals at the moment while keeping my long term goals in my head. Weigh ins will be Tuesdays. Starting with today.
Today's Weight - 187
goal weight for 9/15 - 182
We'll see how it goes.
We're also changing how and what we eat. Better carbs, better fats, better proteins. And less of them. Increasing water intake and decreasing the snacking. I can't cut the snacking out entirely - I'm a snacky type of girl. But I can make better decisions. Garlic Triscuits instead of potato chips. Garlic stuffed olives or gouda cheese instead of sweets. (yes, I do indeed love my garlic). We'll see how it goes.
I'm hoping to blog about this a lot over the next nine months but I will not subject you to before pictures. Too depressing for me and too icky for you. As I get closer (or after I reach my goals) I might post a comparison set. I do have before pictures. I'm just not sharing them until some of the jiggle is gone. And boy do I have jiggle. Honestly, I still look pregnant and my baby is three. If I keep going this way, I'll never feel better about myself, never feel better period. So - away we go...
I don't have a lot of equipment. I have 2 8lb weights, resistance tubes, a wii fit, and a heavy bag. I want to add a resistance ball and a medicine ball when I can but there will be no real machines. I refuse to go to a gym - too many people looking at me. This may change as I get closer to the goal and start focusing more on tone than loss. But for now - that's what I've got. My favorite excersize is boxing/working with the heavy bag. It's just an all over burn that gets my heart going and gives me an outlet for my stress at the same time.
As I go, I may share excersizes or recipes I find, resourses that rock, whatever. Maybe you can get in shape with me.
Nine months to go. 45 pounds to lose.